What a Roller Coaster!

Sorry I am just now getting this out here. Matt and I haven’t located our wireless router yet for our computer and I have been too busy getting the house settled and starting kids in school to take the time to plug in the computer and type. I apologize that there are no pictures with this post but hopefully this weekend I can get some first day of school pictures out here. For now you just have to hear the story.


Our first, second and third days of school have been a roller coaster of emotions. I have hesitated to post anything on here mainly for my sake. Until now I couldn’t even talk about it without crying.
I would say Calyn’s first day was a pretty good one. We met the Dautrich clan at Connie and Jack’s to take pictures before heading on our trek to the school. We walked Corry to her classroom and watched as she quickly and easily took her seat and began coloring.

Going up on our roller coaster…We then all headed over to Calyn’s class room. We walked in and learned where she puts her lunch box and where she puts her back pack. Said cheese for a quick picture, taken by the teacher. Then we got Calyn to her seat. You could tell she was nervous and wanted to cry but she did not. She was a trooper!

That afternoon she said that they put her in the wrong line for the bus but someone noticed that her tag had a different bus number and they moved her to the correct line. She was afraid she was going to be on the wrong bus but it all turned out ok. After school we took the kids for ice cream which is always a hit.

That night we talked about what she liked, what she didn’t like etc. and she seemed to be ok. She did mention that she missed her old school because they got to play a lot more than at this new school.

Tuesday started out ok. Calyn was excited to see Olivia (our next door neighbor that is 8) at the bus stop a.k.a our front yard. Matt said she just hopped on the bus pretty much without even saying good bye. On the bus there are no assigned seats but Kindergarteners sit in the first 4 rows then 1st grade, 2nd 3rd and 4th. This crushed Calyn because the bus driver wouldn’t let her sit by Olivia. She also mentioned that she didn’t know anyone on the bus and didn’t know where she was going when she got to school. We are now at the peak of the roller coaster getting ready to come zooming down. Apparently Calyn cried on the way to school. She got to her classroom (Kindergarteners are escorted to their class after getting off the bus.) and was ok, until the teacher read Chicka Chicka Boom Boom. A book about small letters who climb a coconut tree in alphabetical order until the tree collapses. The capital letters (older relatives of the little ones) come and help them up. The teacher tells me this is when Calyn started breaking. The book reminded her of her mommy and made her cry. From then on the teacher said she was pretty weepy all day and didn’t want to leave her side. She said Calyn held her hand most of the day and cried periodically like when she had to go to music class and PE as well as at lunch. Break. My. Heart!

The bus ride home Calyn also cried because she didn’t get to sit by Corry. The bus driver allowed Corry to come up and sit with Calyn for the ride home which made her happy.

Needless to say Tuesday evening and Wednesday morning were not fun. We heard a lot of “I hate school” School is scary”, “Don’t make me go” “I hate the bus” and there were A LOT of tears. She pretty much cried from 5:30 until bed and then I took over the crying. I have never seen Calyn so vulnerable and scared. She is usually my happy outgoing little chatter box and she was miserable! I can understand her fear. After all she is 5, she knows no one in our neighborhood, except Olivia, she has never been to this school before, never rode a bus or been anywhere by herself. I am 34 and I can tell you even at my age this would make me nervous. She is just a baby. I can’t imagine the fear she has felt the last few days.

Wednesday morning I e-mailed the teacher as soon as I got to work. I warned her of our rough evening and told her that we talked with Calyn about the things that scare her and reassured her that school will be fun she just has to get used to everything.

Wednesday Calyn had some tears while getting ready and some tears as she was getting on the bus. Matt asked the bus driver for Calyn where she should sit and he said she could sit anywhere in the first 4 rows. Calyn chose the first seat.

Going back up on our roller coaster, at 8:22 I got an e-mail from Calyn’s teacher saying Calyn got off the bus with a big smile. She was excited that she got to sit in the first seat and got to be the first one off the bus. I was glad the teacher took the time to send that e-mail to me.

I hesitated to ask a lot of questions about school yesterday evening for fear of another tearful night but when asked if she had to cry at school any she said only once when my teacher had to leave at lunch oh and then I wanted to cry on the way home when I didn’t get to sit by Corry.

Last night was a much better night. We only heard one “I hate school” and there were no tears. She even made the comment “I used to be scared of the bus drivers but now I just talk to them” I would say that is a step in the right direction.

I would love to take all of her fear, hurt, anxiety and absorb it all for her but in my heart I know, this builds character and will only make her a stronger person. It is just a matter of time before she is her usual outgoing little self, I am sure.